Monday, October 31, 2011

Run da Race wif Grace


回到娘家才察覺
在我人生不同的階段裏
總有一些不為人知
又或者以為不能面對的局面出現

在這兒呼吸的每一口都是回憶

每一對熟識的眼睛和不變的口音
都彷彿帶我回到少年時的慕頌日子

在這建築物內外經歷過很多
太多
十多年前以為要背著走一輩子的那些包袱
原來
今天通通都已經放下

錯過恨過跌過痛過愛過衝動過感動過
發現「今天的我」變化其實不算多
我仍然會愛得深淚也真

現在想起來
會心微笑一下


唱歌老師說:
「你太習慣越需要表達時就越躲藏
不是不可 但你躲太多了」

唱歌習慣反映性格
今天回娘家是不想躲
真切關懷的眼神和問候
全收了


dear God,
Can YOU hear me?
Are YOU listening?
Capture me with grace
Carry me run the race

"not because of what I've done
But because of who you are..." 《Who Am I》 - Casting Crowns

Saturday, October 29, 2011

random me


十九今年二十九

十年了
改變了幾多?
熱血還在嗎?
身邊的好友和戰友又多了幾個?


睡不著
又來寫呀寫

很多人在分秒必爭營營役役地過每一天
我卻在輕描淡寫無無聊聊地過這一天

有時刻意讓生活有意義
卻越過越失去生活的意義
連快樂都不懂甚至忘掉

stay tough yet stay fragile
尋找平衡有時會很累人

她說:
執著或許是最大的絆腳石
卻也是讓你繼續向前的馬鞭


二十九的十九臉上再沒有流露稚氣
盲點減少洞悉多了
重點是
他是快樂的


重聽四年前的課
當時的我很生外
老師一樣很專業

random thoughts

謝謝


下雨了
前天雨天昨天晴
今天陰天下微雨

不得不承認自己的惰性
醒過來抬頭看一眼下雨天
轉個身捲起來再入甜夢裡

我真的很愛做夢
不管白日或黑夜

常常脫離現實的狀態
有時連自己身在何處都特別模糊

一路上走著
有時心酸有時暖

上帝沒有將保羅那根刺挪開

只說
刺在 恩典也在
軟弱在 能力也在

「我的恩典夠你用
我的能力
在人的軟弱上顯得完全」


不得不承認的
豈只是自己的惰性
還有那拔不掉的軟弱

上帝有憐憫
我才能在這看不見的路上繼續走著
一起走吧!

I'm thankful.
Still thankful.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

1 vs. 1


這些日子
全是一對一

每一個他和她
都讓我認識了另一個意想不到的他和她
喜歡這種無阻隔又深層的接觸

人和人
中間那片隔膜很微妙
一下子認識
一輩子可以陌生

一天花數小時放下似重要非重要的事
跟另一個只一個生命連接著
這種行為在繁市可能是最奢侈的行為

有人問我為何如此停頓
其實
我一直前進一直追趕
也許一直錯過一些什麼
何苦要不眠不休
暫停
才讓這旅程有意義

在此謝過每一位成全我停下來的人

慢慢看
細細說
走那從前走過和未走過的路

Monday, October 24, 2011

I love you anyway


"I'm unworthy, I do drugs."
"I love you anyway."

"I'm sinful, I murdered."
"I love you anyway."

"I'm filthy, I prostitute."
"I love you anyway."

I met those people today.

And I found...

No matter what we did and
whoever come to HIM...
HE says, "I love you anyway."

I'm not strong enough,
but I know YOU are LOVE.

YOU send me Angel,
never let me go.

Friday, October 21, 2011

不現實的現實


「你諗吓,一世人好短咋嘛,就算要struggle一世,其實都唔係好耐啫!Relax~」-司機先生

天陰天晴天下雨
若是要出門
不管怎樣的心情都總要踏出去
踏出去
又是另一遍天

只是
天氣寒冷的時候
記緊帶一件保暖的外套
不然
又會流鼻水

與敢夢敢作的人相遇
現實的定義原來可以不一樣
這就是文化差異

「人們的看法那麼多
要照顧全世界的目光為別人而活
未免太辛苦也不可能吧
你不是從來也不管嗎?」

放開手吧
You will see a lot more than you can imagine

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Be Lost. Be Found.


With no GPS
don't know my exact destination
I just hit the road
and GO!

心中大概知道目的地的方向
有預計過會迷路又或許會遲到
不過我還是想
亂闖一下感受一下發現一下這似乎熟悉又陌生的地方


有好友喜歡按部就班循規蹈矩
知道走慣的路能走到目的地就永不改道

有好友喜歡走捷徑快人一步
有機會避燈位避交通就隨機改道轉換路段

我的方向感不錯
但偶爾會刻意走遠路走新路
我怕悶亦帶一點任性和少許冒險精神
總之總是希望讓自己看多一點點經歷多一點點

大家都走向同一個目的地
有人喜歡早到有人喜歡準時
我有時候會早有時候會準時有時候選擇遲到

或許是執迷或許是任性或許你不明白
但也無所謂了
很多時候我自己也不懂

有時看到自己的負面字
連自己都想給刪除

多謝你遠遠地喜歡看這個真實我
我也希望可以喜歡
真笑的真痛的真蠢的真懂的真怒的真哭的真醜的真傻的
真迷途的真尋著的那個自己

"Refresh yourself.... Life is good!"
my teacher left me this message yesterday.

Monday, October 17, 2011

想不到會發生什麼


這兒不用深夜走路回家
腳趾頭踏步的聲音幾乎都可以聽得一清二楚

人們走路慢一點
話也慢一點出口

有一陣子常這樣
加班後會想吃點東西然後乘車回家
邊乘車邊想
車子邊走我邊列出待辦事項
有時想到過站想到忘我想到失眠

這兩個星期我慢下腳步來
邊走邊看看路邊的人事物
邊走邊想想自己想想人生
有時候會想想家人想想生命想想死亡
夢仍然很多失眠卻少了

由攝氏四十度至攝氏四度
熱得令人走不快或是冷得令人不能動都無所謂了啦
能夠慢走慢想慢說話就幸福地調慢自己一陣子吧

想那麼多都想不到下一秒會怎樣
偶遇沒有預料的那張臉?
碰上沒有防避的那杯珍珠奶茶?

想不到人生會發生什麼的了
Carry only the trust not the cares I guess


"We were not shocked when change didn't happen.
We would have been surprised if it did."
- 《The Life You've Always Wanted》

Thursday, October 13, 2011

stay tune


we always think our problems are big
until we step out and see the world

三日三夜的 road trip
wooho 挑戰成

日落日出
穿越山嶺農園牛田
心中那條路也廣闊了

i'm amazed
we've traveled over 1200 miles

i remember
黎明前的時間最黑暗
開著車頭燈看到的路不夠3米

then i lifted up my head
omg
there were thousands, millions, billions of stars shinning
so bright so beautiful
i was speechless
感動極

最黑暗的時間
星星似在告訴我
"do not fear, i am with you"
so gentle so calm

Right after the darkest moment
Sunrise
It does, just like what it used to be

"Instead of removing the temptations, the problems of my life
God wants me to overcome by relying on His love and mercy" - K.H. Man
Thanks so much for sharing the deepest part of your heart with me

那些最真最深的話
是沒有預計的收穫
人生本來就 full of surprises

leave the comfort zone, explore the world
don't be a coward, self-pity won't get you anywhere
we are imperfect and we will never be perfect
God is able

It's an inspirational journey in California so far
and this is just the beginning

"He promises nothing is impossible for you.
Not that mountain you're facing
Not that task you're dreading
He may not tell us the details of what's to come
but He reminds us of what's ours no matter what...
A plan that's as good as He is.
Always."

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

no stranger


you were my stranger
i was your stranger

we were strangers

be connected
dont be my stranger again

Thursday, October 06, 2011

Simply Loved


Nice People.

Happy.

Simple.

"You are sentimental ever since I met you in high school" - Otto

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

若不曾走過怎麼懂

『有一日,我突然間嗌到上 high C,唔知點解架,之後又上唔返,都係唔知點解。Sometimes, you just can't explain why things happen like this. There're many possibilites. 冇絕對既方法,冇絕對既解釋,that's life!』- Teacher S.I.

Things happen for a reason

We love
We hate
We success
We fail
We hurt
We heal
We regret
We learn
We tired out
We move on
We stuck

They cycle

and We die
Some go to hell
Some go to heaven
This life will be overed

what's next?
Only Jesus knows

I'm here from 1979 up to 2011 for some reasons
what reasons?
I'm a bitch and it reflects that they are beauties
Maybe that's one of the reasons

Thank you
Thanks everyone
Thanks for the things you've done for me

I know I'm not worth it
Some mistakes you just have to make

若不曾走過怎麼懂

Sunday, October 02, 2011

it hurts, so


why do stars shine? they shine so that the ocean won't be lonely at night.
from an old chinese song.

no love no hurt, love hurts

i rather die loving with pain

instead dying not knowing love